i am totally exhausted today.. damn.. but it is quite satisfying.. u know it is great to get acknowledgement email from my big boss cos at least she knows that i am alive and kicking.. i m so scared she donno my presence..

anyway, i always find myself in a very awkward position in life.. because of my big body frame and height.. thank god i got a pretty face.. or i really can go and die le..

i just dont like changi food lor.. sianz half.. but then it is free.. far better than wasting $5 on lunch right? those $$ can be saved for more clothes!! hahaa.. cheapo me..

working my job brings me close to human nature.. i am so disappointed each time when i see the true color of many people.. they are not they seems they are.. this is quite frightening.. sometimes i wonder if i were to marry a guy.. he appears to be a very nice husband and father but then i wonder if he is a backstabber or someone who manipulate thing at the end of my back.. this thought just sent a chill down my spine.. this world is so cold..

anyway, everyday i will curse that bitch who caused me to suffer for so many months before getting a job.. the r/s between this bitch and her bf was previously strained but i am not sure if it has been restored.. from all the actions of the 30+year old bitch, i can see that her bf means the whole world to her.. everyday i curse that her bf will eventually leave her and this will make her world shatter and hopefully she will kill herself.. her existence in this world is inflicting unnecessary pain on many innocent people.. i will never forget to curse her at least once a day.. she is a bitch who has made me lost abt $20K.. shit her.. if murder is not a crime, i would have killed her long time ago.. but too bad, i wont want to waste my future over such bitch.. this bitch is simply not worth my bright future.. anyway when i flipped to the obituary, i was anticipating to see her photo there.. i hope that the law of nature can just exterminate her existence from the surface of this earth.. to be honest, her mere presence on earth is bringing me horror and bad memories.. i guess the only way to end this is (a) her bf marry someone and leave her totally heartbroken and shattered and thus wasted her life away, (b) to remove her presence on earth.. either one would be ideal.. i hate her to the core.. i will never forget to curse her everyday.. i believe in curses.. especially cursing bitches like her!!