Tuesday, 31 July 2007
hahha.. this is the first entry abt my lab..
ok.. my mentor is finally back from china after 1 month break!!!!!!!!! yipee!!! i like my mentor alot!!!!!!!!!!!!! my mentor is a super nice person!! and now i have decided the molecule i want to synthesize le.. after assurance from my mentor that it could be done!!! =)
so the lab right now is divided into 2 big groups.. led by 2 different master students.. i was the weird one.. because i am with 3 guys while the other group consists of 4 gals.. hhahahaha.. so the "ying" of the other group is super high and has no "yang" to neutralise the "ying".. while my group is 3 "yang" and 1 "ying".. heard that another honor student will join my grp.. i prayed that it is a female!!! @_@ actually we know the name of the student joining le BUT from the name, we cannot really tell the gender of the person.. i think is some vietnam person? i am not sure.. hope tt it is a "ying".. or else the "yang" ratio will be too high le!! hahhaha.. beside i want to find a good fren.. cos it is quite impossible to get a guy best fren cos i feel that only female understands female cos the female species is too complex for the simpleton male species.. therefore, it is easier to relate to female i guess.. hahahhaa..
*yeah*
i passed my NMR test today.. cos yesterday i was busy with practising my violin.. >_<
now i was so exhuasted cos my test was 9am.. and yesterday training was also 9am.. 2 consecutive days of 9am can kill me.. therefore i told my mentor i want to go home after my test.. lab work is ok but i want to practice more of my violin before school starts.. by then i guess i wont have much time for it le.. sobz..
oh ya.. xl went hong kong today.. hahha.. she said she will buy me something!! i m so happy!!! hahahhaahhahahaa...............
that is all for now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
may i get my desired german 3 lecture timeslot.. ~~
more people is joining the lab.. more phD people.. wow.. the lab gonna be so crowded!!!!!!!!!!! sobz.. hope i can get to use the equipment!!!
Sunday, 29 July 2007
no one will know the absolute truth..
when someone tell u something about someone.. there is no way u can tell if they are telling the truth.. but it is based on ur relationship with the person.. if u have great trust in that person, whatever words that comes up from his mouth, u will galdly believe it.. and hardly will u doubt the statement..
this is why i cannot stand if my fren tells other something bad about me.. i m not referring to anyone in general.. but recently i have some interaction with my fren's fren.. let's call my fren's fren A.. so A was so hostile to me.. i guess i know why.. because that is my fren's style and doing..
haiz.. it is ok.. i dont give a damn.. anyway, no big deal if i know one lesser person.. because i have learnt greater lesson out of this.. it is worth it!! =)
Saturday, 28 July 2007
seems like i m leading zombified days recently..
doing of thing i dont know what i m doing..
thinking of thing i dont know why i m thinking..
speaking of thing i dont know what i m speaking..
it is ok.. i believe these days will make me a stronger person.. with greater accumulation of experiences comes greater wealth of knowledge.. i think so..
anyway just decided on modules le.. was convincing kw to take biophysical chem with me.. hahah. me and kw are gg to kill ourselves next semester!!
because we are gg to take:
CM4241-trace analysis (open bk)
CM4236-spectroscopy in biophysical world(open bk)
CM4261-surface sci or CM4266-material chem(both close bk)
LAG3201-german 3
CM4261 or CM4266? i prefer the latter though i m fine with anyone since both are not open book.. haiz.. there is no other mod that is open book le.. because i m trying to regulate my CAP this semester, i cannot take any organic chem cos organic chem will cause my CAP to dip de.. just like the stupid biomolecules mod last semester!!!!!!!!!!!
ya.. alot of pple said i m crazy.. honour proj is 16 MC over 2 sem.. so i shld not take 4 mod this semester cos pple think i willl not have sufficient time.. but anyway, after exams, just check and see if i am still alive..
Saturday, 21 July 2007
sales are good.. why? u can get real cheap deals.. but that would take up one whole day.. attempting to find good stuff among the garbage.. yup.. most of the clothing in sales are horrific.. therefore, considerably great effort and stamina are needed to sieve out the good stuff from bad.. just like finding a fine needle from the sea.. hahaha..
so yesterday went K-lunch with xl and mq.. hahaha.. the standard of the lunch is detereorating leh.. fish or chicken.. like wat u are likely to hear on the plane.. chose fish.. but they serve those cheapo dory fillet deep fried.. my god.. deep fried.. mq was saying that deep fried is bad for a singing throat and i absolutely agreed.. hahaha.. and the deep fried sushi.. though it was soaked in generous amount of oil.. i still gobbled down the whole sinful oily sushi voraciously because the seasoning is fantastically delectable.. my god.. the next time, i must remmeber to press the sushi against 3 sheets of tissue paper to drain out the excess oil..
then went to taka and saw got this food festival sort of thing.. bought a deep fried korean sauague with a super thick fried dough coating.. hmm.. i regretted buying that.. mq also treated me and xl with a stick of chicken from the same stall..
so then went around with xl to shop while mq left us for bank and NUS coop.. hahhaa.. sales is for u to get cheap stuff.. not pretty stuff.. cos pretty stuff are normally not on sales.. better to buy it after sales.. cos u need the $$ for the sales items!!
bought a top from espirit and mango.. something ironic abt mango.. the shopping bag of mango is so pretty but the clothes there is not pretty.. why dont they just channel the creativity and style of the paper bag to the clothes? hahaha..
anyway the time table is out.. a dilemma again.. cos there is some shuffling of the time table.. now that watever i want to take doesnt clash.. but i dont know wat to eliminate.. shld i take a level 3000 chem modules? but it is better to take 4000 right? but i think 3000 module is super easy.. how how?
or shld i just simply take quantum chemistry in my last sem? haha.. my passion always has been in quantum physics and chemistry but they are just way too hard for me.. hhhaa..
Monday, 16 July 2007
sometimes i don't understand why human like to dwell on their past and then let out a sigh of regrets which is followed by an overwhelming sense of sadness.. why did i do that in the past?
i understand that one should not look back because whatever has happened has happened.. we are no magician.. we cannot speak any spell to change our past.. the only thing we can do is not to repeat our regreted actions in the future.. in another words, never look back but look forward..
but it is easier said than done..
darn.. i shall not mention anything about my grades anymore.. it is saddening to think of my CAP.. it seems so hopeless..
i have recently planned my future.. everything is so beautiful.. and i am trying so hard recently to get something done for my future.. but for the time being progress for my future is zero.. because it is abit idealistic.. and i am still fine tuning..
progress: 0%
effort: 50%
Sunday, 15 July 2007
haha.. recently i am quite satisfied.. cos i m quite close to getting wat i want.. though more effort is still needed and the route to my final goal is ardous and mentally strengous.. i believe the fire within me will push me to go beyond my capability.. hopefully i can achieve my want.. cos it is simply too important for me..
now that my fyp stuff is more or less settled, i should seriously plan the route to getting to my final destination.. there is nothing i cannot attain if and only if i can reach that destination.. yes.. i have confident in my preceding sentence.. however the hurdle now is the possibilty to get to that destination..
anyway.. i have baked some smiley cookies yesterday.. baked quite alot but alot are defect.. only 5 are ok.. i wonder who will eventually get them? hahha.. cos i dont bear to eat them.. they are products of my blood and sweat.. hahaha.. look at the smile.. is it a wide smile? or not wide enough? hahaha
I really cannot bear to eat smiley biscuit.. these are the 5 that are ok.. the rest all flop.. those failed one are those with super big mouth.. some with less curvy smiles.. think i will just give them out!!!
Thursday, 12 July 2007
last tuesday i was nearly disfigured!! it is darn horrible just to think about it..
i was in lab doing column.. then the glass of the column suddenly broke and glass pieces flied towards me.. and i guessed i was too exhuasted because i was suffering from insomnia those few days.. my reflex action to scam from the glass pieces was not working.. luckily there were only a few glass pieces and they were large pieces and i was wearing lab coat and long jeans.. and most importantly, my face.. thank god that i was wearing mask and safety googles.. which means that the glass pieces did no harm to my face.. thank goodness..
i can never imagine how it was like if those glass pieces left a permanent scar across my face.. i would be disfigured.. i can never imagine if i have the courage to carry on living as a witch..
human beings are visual creature.. if u want someone to notice u or get something.. u got to make the first impression.. a disfigured face will definitely give u bad first impression!!! because no one willl ever believe that an ugly person can perform and an ugly person is a good person.. trust me.. we are living in this stupid and crazy world where looks are simply so important.. i understand that i m not a pretty lady but a scar across my face will make me one of the ugliest soul on earth.. who will want to give me a chance to work in the future? i can never work in the service sector.. nor can i work in the business sector.. there is simply nowhere i can go.. my ugly face can only do those behind-the-scene work..
i simply hate it when someone tells me.. my god.. looks is not everything.. character, self-confidence and dunno wat stupid crapz matter most.. would u want someone who is good-looking but sucks in character? people who say this is either childish or plain deceptive.. trying to disguise their true feeling.. because it is not good to acknowledge that they themselve too judge people by their looks..
anyway.. wake up folks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! have u all watched cinderella?? snow white and the 7 dwarfs? sleeping beauty?? all the pretty humans are either prince or princess or some weak fragile folks under the tyranny of a great baddie.. and interestingly, all the baddies in the fairy tales(witches or some villians) are depicted as ugly people..
ok.. human.. u r pardoned for being a visual creature.. because u r influenced by the mass media(mainly by fairytales when u are so young and just start to comprehend the world), by ur parents, by everyone around u that the good will be pretty and ugly shall be the bad..
indeed this accident in the lab caused me to ponder so many thing about my life.. if i were to ever have children in the future.. i will groom them well.. so that they will not be witches or villians.. but princes and princesses..
Sunday, 8 July 2007
2 dresses, 8 tops, 1 skirt, 1 half jacket..
it's the first time i bought so many thing at one go.. hahhaa..
should have gone to zara first.. because zara was.. not.. is (present tense) having sales.. before i went to zara, i have already bought a dress but i saw a pretty dress and i decided to try.. the queue to the fitting room was so long.. nevertheless, i was hoping it dont look good on me.. so i wont have any reason to buy it.. but alas, it fitted so perfectly on me.. haiz.. if only i came to zara first, i wouldnt have bought the dress from i forgot-the-name shop.. haiz.. cos vivo is so big, if i dont buy, i might have difficulty gg back to the same store.. hahaha..
i also like some clothes from GAP and warehouse but.. haiz.. they are too ex.. got restricted by the price tag.. but it is ok.. i will work harder in the future so i can buy them.. hahaha..
haiz.. i guess i will never go into any boutique for at least 2 months.. i wonder wat has gone into me.. hahaha..
so sianz.. then come the module planning thing.. it is a total crapz.. there are 2 modules i want to take very very very badly but they clash!!!!!!!!!!! wat shld i do? *faint* it is simply so annoying.. i have already planned the 4 modules i wanna take next sem.. but 2 of them clash.. i guess my supervisor will be happy if i take only 3 modules.. cos he said that fyp is alot of time.. and i might not have time for 4 modules.. and he dont see the reason why i shld take 4.. haiz.. i m in a terrible dilemma now.. still thinking of wat to do.. worst come to worst just take 3 level 4000 cores and german 3.. hahah.. then see how my CAP perform skydiving next sem.. hahah.. i want to take that level 3000 core la......................... sobz.. how???? but i got a hunch that i might do relatively ok for trace analysis.. must i really give up? or is this an omen that i might do badly for trace analysis so i got trouble with it now? ahhahahaha..
Wednesday, 4 July 2007
i felt so small when people starts to talk about their academic achievements.. because i felt that i could have be like them.. if only i put my studies at my first priority when i was in year 1 and year 2.. at least i m richer now.. at least my CAP is now not in such a mess.. *faint*
whatever has happened had happened.. no point looking back and lamenting at my past anymore.. what i can do now is to understand my first priority in life.. i guess there will only be 2 topmost priorities for the upcoming semester.. my family and my studies..
haiz.. i should have taken a UROPS when i was in year 2.. guess the fact that i cannot get into medical school have a great impact on me.. even until now.. but it is ok.. i shall not be enslaved by this handicap.. life is never smooth-sailing.. so just go with the flow.. and accept reality..
ok la.. i felt so ashamed of many thing right now.. only started studying in year 2 sem 2.. haiz.. the earlier of the semester was spent skipping lectures, skipping tutorials and copying answers of tutorial from friends, not paying attention in lectures..
if only i could go back to year 1.. i promise i will have some achievements..
i declare, history will never repeat itself..
