Tuesday, 29 April 2014
hmmm.. recently i think i have grown fatter due to overindulgence of food and stress at work.. it's a little scary because normally i eat alot so such indulgence shouldn't have much impact on me leh...
Well, i am very scared because it seems like the world judges girls based on their appearance.. i am not vain.. i am just following the worldly practice to be more socially acceptable..
Now it seems like a nightmare! I am so worried i might revert to my college-self.. i was so fat then... alot of classmates were making fun of me and i don't really have many friends.. i was pretty sure my character in college was much better than that in university..
In primary school, a boy whom i always played with asked his friend to pass me a note.. the note said, 'i love u but u are too fat'..
In JC, 2 guys were sitting near me in lecture hall.. my classmate was telling his fren that he liked me.. his fren discouraged him citing some reasons about my 100+kg weight.. i could not remember the exact words they used.. though they talked softly, they were so close to me.. hello, i was fat, but i wasn't deaf!
The sudden transformation to be less heavier made me more socially acceptable.. well it seems to have happened overnight and the effect was amazing.. from then on, i learnt about the harsh facts of life..
Well, for the sake of myself.. i better be more alert over my weight.. i have come thus far, i will not allow my effort to go down the drain..
What an inspirational post siah.. but i think i wanna eat ice cream again tomorrow... bleahx
Sunday, 27 April 2014
i am really scared of people who expects something in return for everything..
Well sometimes i really have no idea that someone's expecting something in return from me.. so if i were to be told to 'return a favour', i will feel damn stressed because i might not be able to live up to the expectation..
Well, we are just frens... why must we set expectation on each other? We already have to meet alot of expectation @ work and home.. why do we need to add on to the bucket list of expectations?
Thursday, 24 April 2014
so happy that i'll be going for a hotel course with PS and WT! Wa, i am really looking forward to it..
I really missed the life at naval base.. every morning, WT and I would take the same shuttle bus to base.. then we would go to the ladies and then pantry to get water.. then i would eat my bread and chat with them..
Lunch would be at the cookhouse where i would take a big serving of food.. My colleagues wondered why my weigh didn't flactuate much with such huge daily intake..
WT and I would take the shuttle bus home together too..
My boss is also a very nice lady =) She coached me alot and often gave us a lift...
Well, if i could turn back Time, i would still request for posting because my section would be relocated to another office that is further soon.. and i would still be away from my boss, PS and WT... plus i wanna develop my soft skill..
Monday, 21 April 2014
signs after signs.. u tried so hard to pretend that these signs meant nothing.. there came more signs.. more and more signs.. all pointing to that heartbreaking conclusion.. then u finally saw that conclusion and slowly realised that there's nothing u could do to change the ending.. the hoping against hope was futile..
One day, u decided to leave and go somewhere else.. once the plan was firmed, there were news that x would b back here.. this was so eery.. just a few months after ur departure, x's back to that place.. seems like it was God's plan to put an end to this story by forbidding the paths to ever cross again..
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When God shuts one door, He opens another door.. well, sometimes we go through certain unpleasant events for a purpose.. to gather more life experiences and to be more zen about life..
I have made many mistakes previously.. but i am sure, i would try my best not to repeat the mistakes..
Oh well, u just got to take it easy! Have a break, have a kit kat..
Sometimes u got out of ur mind.. u got a sudden urge to do stupid things.. well, the urge is usually is very shortlive.. so a few moments after the crazy thought, u regain ur consciousness and u realize how crazy u r.. but secretly hope that u will fall into that crazy state soon.. come, let's drink some alcohol! LOL
Sunday, 20 April 2014
Went to JBfor a shortweekend stay.. the crowd at the custom was damn scary.. the entire immigration hall @ e malaysian side was filled to the brim... there were 16 lanes. We queued @ lane 2 or 3 which were nearest to the entrance.. it was a wrong choice... many idiot pretended to be msian and queued at lane1 which was for holders of malaysian passport.. then they merged into lane 2 and 3..
It Took us 3 hours to clear the custom.. my bf's frens who queued @ lane 15/16 only took 45mins to clear.. another of his frens queued @lane 8/9 took 2 hours..
The most dramatic thing that ever happened was that i fainted.. i think i was too hungry.. lol.. luckily bf was beside me.. bf said i looked scary when i fainted lol..
Well.. Morale of the story is to carry some food with u... esp when u have to clear the custom at the msian side...
After 3 hours, we cleared the custom.. a high ranking official was shouting at the 'no waiting' area,'no waiting or i send you all back to your country'.
Monday, 14 April 2014
Got very pissed cos i can't dye my hair and i hv eaten the entire packet of fries even when it's not nice... luckily the rice burger's nice... well after i bought e rice burger, i regretted after i saw a new Burger.. well got to be positive.. maybe e burger just looks nice but tastes sucky.. anw, y did i finiSH e sucky fries?
darn.. i think i need to go for a run but i haven't reached hm.. bleahx...
Sunday, 13 April 2014
I think I am going crazy doing alot of brainless things recently.. the traveling everyday has really taken a toll on my lifestyle.. My workplace's really ulu.. Wonder if it's time to change or should i just try a little while more?
Or maybe things will be better in early Aug.. only early Aug..
Wednesday, 9 April 2014
I ate 3 very potent meal yesterday.
morning: Nasi lemak with fried fish fillet, veg and luncheon meat..
Lunch: Curry rice with fried chicken cutlet, egg and luncheon meat.
Dinner was slightly healthier. Herbal soup with pumpkin rice...
I also snack on cheese cream biscuit around 4+..
Yesh I am crazy =P And i feeling heaty now...
Sunday, 6 April 2014
life's good recently..
I am on a job that gives me opportunities to develop my soft skills..
My r/s w my bf's good! We have survived 4 months together.. And we haven't quarrelled since we are together.. Hope that we will be more understanding towards each other and our love will grow.. and i hope my bf'll meet me more often..
Mq's getting married in jul.. kind of excited.. n this's my 1st time being a sister.. cos i am quite lazy to do such thing but as mq's my best fren, i ok to help lol.. well think her wedding's going to be v grand.. really looking forward to it.. she's buying a dress for all her sis.. oops i better lose some weight cos am very worried that the dress's v revealing..
I m hanging out with my frens more too.. hmmm but there r some peeps i have not managed to arrange to meet up.. i will arrange to meet w more peeps after my busy period.. recently i hang out more w my uni peeps.. actually i am very grateful for those peeps i met in uni as they r very nice and tolerating towards me even when i was quite horrible then.. and they let me copy their assignments and also taught me things i didn't understand@class.. sadly there r also peeps i need to keep a distance away too..
I also have some nice colleagues i can hang out with.. =) we just went high tea ytd.. looking forward to moo ka ta with them..
Hahaha there r many things to give thanks for.. someone once told me that @ the end of each day, we should find 3 things to be thankful for the day.. when we are happy and contented , we'll lead a happier life.. we can't choose what kind of life we want.. for eg, i really v upset with my height.. however, we can view our life with a positive perspective.. well, in this manner, we can generate greater happiness and embrace life =)
if u could go back in time, trust me, i would do Certain things differently...
Wednesday, 2 April 2014
today is a weird day..
I started the day with insufficient sleep...
Someone also sent me complicated messages.. humans r just curious creatures.. they'll do their best to gather intelligence.. Well I just feel that we always try to guess what was on the other person's mind.. Sadly, we usually make wrong guesses.. With wrong guesses, we will make wrong decision..
We shouldn't wait for good things to drop from the sky.. we need to do the right thing to get the desired results..
Sometimes we need to be more confident. With confidence, we will be very positive that we can make the right decision..
Everything is about time and space..
Tuesday, 1 April 2014
i really like being on the stage.. i really like being an emcee.. haha last dec, i gt a chance to b an emcee.. but i think i had done quite badly.. i think i prefer the more informal events... i volunteered for mq's wedding but she don't want lol...
I really wanna sing on a stage like a superstar.. but this one a little hard cos i don't think i sing well...
I wanna be a very interesting speaker!
Recently i gt an urge to look better lol.. wonder if is related to all these..
