the transfer of negativity

recently i am in very bad mood.. yup.. terrible horrible mood.. partly contributed by lack of sleep.. and didn't get the chance to eat the wasabi fillet o fish burger.. so ytd i transfered my negativity to someone.. yup.. after i simmered down, i couldnt believe wat i have done..

anyway.. two shit guys also contributed to my terrible mood.. thanks to you 2 guys.. thanks for making my mood even worst..

the 1st guy.. i realised most guys are generally illiterate.. for instance, i have been trying to contact this shit colleague fr fri to sat.. until i finally gave up and sent an sms to ask him TO RETURN MY CALL!! that asshole sms me on sun 9pm and asked if i have anything to tell him.. wtf? i already mentioned in my sms i have thing to let him know.. cos my sms ringtone was very soft.. it is ok.. i shouldnt have expected anything fr the martian anyway..

the 2nd guy.. a total idoit!! pls.. i do sales and customer service de.. u tin i don't know what u thinking ma? anyway, that idiot was waiting for bus at the bus stop.. i was walking towards the bus stop and i saw him.. when my eyes met his, he quickly turned away.. then i walked in front of him and waved.. he pretended not to see me.. damn idiot.. i thought i was told by my dearest coursemates that i was very very fat and i will definitely be left on the shelf that kind.. so is it possible that he will miss a massive giant? and that giant was waving her super thick arms at him.. darn martian.. asshole la.. u tin u r wat? ugly looks, no $$.. and u want me to take initiative all the time? and for heaven sakes, i asked u to join me and my colleagues for lunch on ur first day of work is not because i like u lor.. is that my boss ask me to do so de.. and then i intro u to my colleagues is not i like u lor, is i have to do so cos on the first day, we actually bumped to each other at the bus stop after work and if i didnt intro u to them then how? u will be taking the same train with my colleagues.. i am just trying to help u.. damn it.. that asshole then fake fake came over and say hi.. it is too late.. he has already made it to my hate list.. i mean for heaven sakes la.. i must be crazy to love someone like u..

talking about this issue, i suddenly tot of 1 guy in uni.. the freshies were actually teasing me and another guy (someone fr another OG but we don't know each other personally).. so my style of handling rumours would be to play along with people.. i was telling them that i like him and that guy suddenly appeared and i could see that his face turned pale white.. whiter than a piece of the super white tissue paper.. my god.. uni liaoz.. this kind of thing u actually believe.. maybe i need to mention that this happened when my weight was between 90 to 100kg.. that guy actually avoided me.. so damn obvious.. whenever he saw me walking towards him, he will reverse and walk in another direction.. then came the day when i slim down.. but then still fat la.. then his attitude changed.. he actually would smile and nod when we bumped into each other.. and my response? i don't give even a damn to him..

damn.. my life is very terrible horrible liaoz.. don't make it worse hao ma? and ya, i told u i don't like the oily food.. so i decide to lunch at 1pm with sh.. today, she actually came to me and asked me to go lunch with her at noon at somewhere i want to eat.. shit.. this is just a trick.. if i oblige, i will be termed as someone who is self centered and forced people to eat at the place they dont like to eat.. since sh and i shared the same interest.. i eat with her and u eat urself hao le.. sorry i don't compromise anymore.. i cannot have alot of thing i want in my way.. but at least i can control the food i consume right? if i don't even have the rights to control wat i want to eat.. i tin i can just go and die le.. cos it is very sad to be someone without any rights..

and all the shit i have gone through simply shows me that i am wrong.. my exterior is wrong wrong wrong.. my appearance is just socially unacceptable.. since my exterior is now like that of the rotten apple.. who would even bother to just remove the rotten exterior so as to taste the sweet un-rotten part ne? but now the rotten apple still is able to differentiate lies from truth.. if doing nothing means love.. wa seh.. then this rotten apple is being borned into this world of people who loves her dearly.. love means action because action speaks louder than words.. i understand liaoz.. if u tin that the rotten apple is a beggar and beggar has no rights to choose.. u r wrong liaoz.. the beggar still do has the option to starve and die..

shit.. better think twice before you intend to get on my nerve!