forgot my password to this blog again!! i am so scared i will forget my yahoo mail password because i hardly use my yahoo mail.. imagine if i were to request for password for my blog, it would be sent to my yahoo mail and then i forget my yahoo mail password and also the answer to the question to retrieve the password.. my god, i will be screwed lor.. i like this blog, i don't want to change to a new blog..

anyway, today N said that i look like doll cos i have freckles.. someone then mentioned that barbie doll has no freckles so it was not supposed to be a compliment.. cos the doll she was refering to was most probably the big-faced ragged doll with her hair braided into 2 braid.. that kind of ugly doll.. haiz.. then i rather be those killer dolls in seed of chucky.. at least i can kill bitches and those guys who live off woman!! anyway, this is the first time anyone said that i look like a doll..

Was supposed to do my homework when i met S in the library.. ended up talking to him instead and i didn't do my homework.. i told S that i have given up on going to DE with saddness in my tone.. after that, i felt even sadder.. when i was young, i always believe that u can make thing happens if u put in effort.. but this has proven to be a hoax.. so my dream of going to DE will never happen.. and i will never be happy.. when was the last time i feel heavenly happy? i cannot remember.. what i could remember was that i have been feel very very sad for a long time..

p/s: i have previously tried to go DE but it failed.. not that i never tried.. but now i am reluctant to try again because of no confidence of succeeding.. DE shall just be my dream..

p/s2: i remembered i asked 1 of my guy-fren if he likes anyone.. he replied that he was very upset at that moment and therefore he was unable to like anyone.. now i finally understood what does that mean..

most of the time, i wonder if you would console me if you are still alive.. maybe i will be happier if you are still alive.. because i am sure that you will guide me to happiness..