dear God,
why do u have to drive me to my walls? I am very disgusted with so many thing recently.. the worst being the lack of sleep.. I used to sleep more than 10 hours a day and now maybe only 6 hours.. nevertheless, I did so badly for my FYP.. Don't tell me that it is ur challenge to make me stronger.. I am so sick of this already.. What exactly is ur intention? U want me to graduate with a lousy honor degree and therefore I cannot go anywhere with it? In the hope that I can be stronger? God, u have succeeded because I have been trying to overcome my tears most of the time for fear of getting a B and below for my FYP.. and this is a painful experience, nevertheles u have succeeded.. Carpz..
And why am I born in a way when i eat carbo, my body miraclously convert all the carbo directly into fats? and hence I will be a spinster for the rest of my life.. probably because I used to be 103 kg in the past, I have gone through the stage where people mocks at me, guys ridicules me, this really makes me lose hope in humanity.. I have frens who eat more than I do but they didnt seems to be as fat as i do.. Is this another challenge that you have posed for me AGAIN? so as to make me stronger? Ya, indeed u have succeeded, I am a strong sumo wrestler in the eyes of many homosapiens.. when someone (mostly with guys, they will purposely single me out to help in lifting heavy stuff) asked me to lift a super heavy stuff and I can't do it, people thought that I was simply playing or refusing to help and hence, i have to summon so so much strength, until i could feel my arms breaking and I felt excruciating pain.. God, u have indeed make me look so strong in the eyes of guys especially.. Carpz..
wonder why human have no common sense!!! especially with guys!!! I am fat and hence my body is filled with fats!!! not muscle!!!!!!! so how can i be strong?? probably school should force everyone to take biology for O level..
I realised that to do well, people has to leave their ten commandements at home.. I guess most of the time, i m too honest.. probably this is the main reason for my downfall most of the time.. I must learn not to naive anymore..
the world is but a ugly place..
and looking back at my life, I realised that I am too naive.. but I will change.. what to make me stronger? please lah..
probably u dont even exist..
your sincerely
someone who wants to believe u..
