it is sat.. incredible.. what i like about weekend is that there is no lab.. lab has indeed taken a toll on me.. it is just painstakingly exhausting..

anyway, recently i was thinking about some issues about human and i got so upset with certain species of the homo sapien population.. do i really have to shed an extra of 10 kg so that i will have a wonderful home with a loving husband and 2 beautiful children? although i m awared of this all the time, i did nothing.. instead i ate more recently..

now i understand why only pretty gals deserve to have good thing and husbands in life.. the reason is simply.. cos they sacrificed themselve.. they see delectable cuisine, they cannot eat.. they see chocolate, they desire to eat but they have to lie saying they hate chocolate.. it is so stressful to control your cravings and desires to shove the tasty food into ur mouth.. but they did it..

it is just disgusting to spend so much money on make up and clothes.. and if all the stupid and ignorant guys didnt notice, pretty clothes that can hug ur body so that it can accentuate ur figure can never be found in pasa malam or cheapo shop.. probably 1 or two is possible but most belong to the collections of expensive boutique!! so stupid guys, don't u dare complain a gal spending so much on clothes.. and guys are damn freak who are just so visual, can they stand their gf wearing the same clothes every week or clothes that doesn't accentuate their figure?? gals might not earn alot, but they are willing to spend so much on make up and clothes, i really salute them..

cheap make up brand like maybelline, i have tried their blush and it is amazing that once i put the blush on, most of them are gone within a short time.. yeah.. i was amused.. so imagine those gals who didnt earn alot, but they spend so much on make up.. they deserve our respect..

sometimes i keep thinking of what my dad has told me.. i felt angry.. but after a while i pondered.. i realised that pretty gals really deserved to be loved.. they have put in tremendous effort in maintaining their petite figure, schrimping all their money on accessories, make up and clothes.. investing money in all the beauty products and stuff.. they really deserved to be loved cos i cannot do it as well..

if u r trying to say that love is beyond looks.. save it.. i know the model perception as well.. but let's be practical.. the world is a cruel place..

i can remember that a few years ago, i weighed a whopping 103 kg.. then there was this guy who liked me.. so during class, he sat with his fren behind me.. and i overheard their conversation (i never wanted to eve drop but they simply thought i was deaf).. his fren was telling him, 不要喜欢她啦，她太肥了.. did they purposely do it loudly for me to know so i could lose weigh and then we can be together? so this IS love? this incident can never abandon my mind.. until now, it is still fresh in my mind..

actually i wasn't alone.. there are many of my pretty and slender gfs who used to be fat and therefore are criticised by guys or are ostracised by guys and gals alike.. it is interesting to know that that doesn't only happen to me as i shared my story.. but becos they succeeded in losing weigh, they are all attached now.. haha.. i guess i still got 10 kg more to shed before getting a bf ba..