A world with me and myself.

Friday, 3 August 2007

recently i have an unexplanable interest to delve into life.. perhaps my life has gone too strenguous for me becos i am now doing thing i have not much interest in.. 1 more year and all the lingering pain that perpetually overwhelmed me will vanished for the rest of my life.. 1 more year..

perhaps i have never grown to love what i m doing now.. cos that was never my first choice.. a man who fails to plan, plan to fail.. this quote may seems so inspiring.. i first came across this quote when i was in secondary 3.. from then on.. this "inspiring" quote became my motto.. i identified my ultimate goal and then explored numerous possibilities which could lead to the path and then try my best to keep up with my plan..

3 years later, i came to learn that the quote is purely fictious.. any resemblance to the events in real life is purely coincidental.. and from that moment on, i promised myself to live each day with less regard for the future.. becos planning is solely a waste of time..

indeed planning is a waste of time.. so wat if u plan to get married at the age of 26, but only to find urself without a bf at the age of 25 yrs and 364 days? becos u innocently believe that only inner beauty can lead u to real love.. u try to cultivate ur inner self to goodness.. eventually u then realised inner beauty is only an added advantage to outer beauty.. as long as u have ravashing outer beauty, u can command all the guys in the world.. inner beauty is just an added advantage.. if u have no outer beauty, u will only be doomed to attract guys who need a maid, a person to supplement the income and a free sex partner (i never forget this is what came out from one of my guy fren.. he was telling me that even if u go prostituting, u need to pay but u dont have to pay ur wife!!).. oh ya.. by the way i thanked him for being so truthful..

why more singaporean guys are turning to vietnam for brides? becos they dont know that their miserly monthly income cannot get them a wife who is pretty, capable of cooking and never talked back to them.. however they din want to get ugly wife so they decide to outsource.. i m sorry if i offend them but i really despise them.. have they absolutely no female frens? that they are willing to marry an unknown stranger?

indeed planning is a waste of time.. sometimes i marvelled my old self for drawing timeline to get thing done in the hope that with such diligence, sucess would await me.. nevertheless i m a pathetic failure.. perhaps i shouldnt have done honours.. perhaps i shld just graduate.. perhaps i should have waited for 1 yr before enrolling myself into the uni.. so that i have time to sort out my thoughts and accept the harsh reality.. recently so many people kept asking what i want to do when i graduate.. i simply dont know how to answer them.. because i m not going to plan anymore.. i simply dont want history to repeat itself.. so please.. i m not trying to be secretive or wat crapz.. i only dont want to think.. imagine the sadness i will experience if i were to plan so nicely for a goal only to find myself nowhere there after investment of tremendous efforts..

haiz.. i m so sianz with my project.. but xl is not in singapore now.. i cannot lament to her.. haiz.. really looking forward to her return next week.........

for the time being i still got a literature review to do.. this is crazy!! really feel like graduating now..

¤Take it easy... C'est la vie..¤